Filtering by Tag: Consent

Do you know what consent is?

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Consent is described as: permission for something to happen or agreement to do something.Consent is a vital part of creating a culture and community in which everyone feels safe and comfortable to live in. 
Silence does not permit consent. It is clearly communicated, not negotiated.
An unconscious or intoxicated person under the influence of drugs or alcohol who is unable to knowingly consent cannot legally agree to sexual activity.
Past consent does not guarantee future consent.
A person has every right to change their mind at any point in time, because consent is ongoing.
Finally, even if you're in a long term marriage, consent is still vital. 

What is Consent?

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If you are unsure what defines consent here is an outline from the Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Centre: "Consent is when someone agrees, gives permission, or says "yes" to sexual activity with other persons. Consent is always freely given and all people in a sexual situation must feel that they are able to say "yes" or "no" or stop the sexual activity at any point." 1.When you’re engaging in sexual activity, consent is about communication. And it should happen EVERY time. 
2. consent for one activity, one time, does not mean giving consent for increased or recurring sexual contact.
3. Sexual assault can happen in marriages not just one night stands.
4. Finally remember you can withdraw consent if you no longer feel comfortable.

Remember sex without consent isn't sex.

Uma Thurman

Reading the piece in the @nytimes with Uma Thurman today I was really struck by one of the final paragraphs.

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When you tell your child that they were harmed because another person likes them, you’re connecting pain with love. That not only normalizes being abused, but also abusing others.

This then perpetuates further into adult relationships and normalises cruelty and unkindness from partners. If love is patient, kind, understanding, and compassionate, then surely love is not cruel, mean and violent?